Walking: Grieving And Rejoicing

I've spent many hours walking this summer - through my neighborhood, along a canal in Indianapolis, down a mountain in Vermont, and through many, many parks in New Jersey. By the time summer is over, I will have logged nearly 300 miles. This is happening in part because my husband and I are training to walk a half-marathon in December and in part because I have been grieving. And so I walk and I pray and I grieve.

I've walked with my husband, and with my friend Meredith, but most of those miles I have walked alone. Something is soothing about being out in nature, using my legs and my arms, hearing my own breathing and feeling the sweat pour down my face. It's a reminder that every breath is a gift from the One who loved us into being.

In the Presence of Faithful Friends

"Faithful friends are a sturdy shelter; whoever finds one finds a treasure.

Faithful friends are beyond price, no amount can balance their worth."

Last night I gathered more than a handful of women friends to share a meal at a Korean restaurant in our shared hometown. Over bulgogi and banchan and wine and hard cider, we talked for hours about any number of things. We were the last group to leave the restaurant last night. Yes, we closed the place down.

Overcoming Burnout By Counting My Blessings

A loving and loyal husband. Two healthy sons. A working car. WQXR. A job I love.

These are the five things I wrote down today in my gratitude journal. I've had a long, tough winter and, toward its end, realized I was burned out. So I bought an online workshop called The Restore Workshop, developed by a couple of women, including Elizabeth Foss, one of my favorite bloggers. These are women who know all to well about burn out and they have just the right prescription for me.

A Painter's Journey with Multiple Sclerosis: "Everyone Has a Yearning to Make a Mark"

Our older son's godmother just posted this video on her facebook feed. It is the story of a man, Brett Weber, a neuroscientist and painter. He died today of complications from multiple sclerosis.

photograph by Frank Wiese

From A Stage Four Cancer Patient: "Never Have I Felt So Accompanied in My Life"

I have shared by friend Frank Simmonds' journey of pain and faith. He has stage four neuroendocrine cancer. Here is another remarkable video from him, just before he undergoes open-heart surgery at Maimonides Medical Center in Brooklyn tomorrow. Please pray for him, his wife and their two young sons. This Lenten season, Frank is facing the prospect of his own death with a deep gratitude for the life he has been given. We should all do the same.

"We live our life but a minute... like a whisper. Then we come fact to face with an unknown entity called Death..The good thing about me is. I encounter another entity...my faith in my Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ.
)

Waiting in Joyful Hope

Tonight, the priest left the altar and walked down the aisle. And walked. Said nothing and kept walking. He got to the back of the church and turned around. He kept walking.  Some of us giggled. Some of us looked annoyed. All of us were waiting for him to speak.

On MiniGolf and Mystery

Tonight found me in an unlikely-for-me place: a glow-in-the dark indoor miniature golf course in a strip shopping mall off a state highway.

I proposed the location for a Saturday night date with my husband and he agreed. While we waited our turn at mini-golf, we played skee-ball and a few rounds of Hoop Fever.

We had a great time. Our teen sons would be grateful they had not come along since while we played - me cheating and my husband diligently marking his own score with a glow-in-the-dark pencil - I was singing and dancing to the 1970s music that blared through out the facility.

Twenty Years In: What Marriage Looks Like

All the wealth in the world cannot be compared with the happiness of living together happily united.

Blessed Margaret d’Youville

A Saturn sedan with no working horn, odometer, gas gauge or ceiling upholstery, sits in our driveway, It's as old as our marriage and not faring nearly as well.  Twenty years ago today, I married the man of my dreams.  A family member asked us at the end of our reception: "Are you sad this is all over?" Greg and I both responded at the same time: "It's not over. It's just starting!"

I cherish the life we have made together. Still, it's not all chocolates and flowers. Sometimes I feel as worn out as that car of ours.

Carrying the Cross of Cancer with a Heart WIde Open

My friend Frank Simmonds continues to share his suffering and his faith in the face of cancer as he "walks toward the Infinite." He shows us how to live suffering with meaning.

One of my favorite comments is: "Where were you when the Universe was created?"

At the End of A Difficult Day, Love Endures

 

I had a tumultuous traveling day, flying from Newark to Birmingham, Alabama, with a layover in Detroit. I forgot some important items at home, which will make my travels difficult. Tonight I find myself visiting with old parish friends before I tour civil-rights sites in Alabama and attend a teachers' conference in author Harper Lee's hometown. How ironic to find myself here, in a state that has endured so much violence and racial strife, on the day a Florida jury found an unarmed black teen's killer guilty of absolutely nothing. It can be so discouraging, this search for justice.

Theme Thursday: Girls

I grew up in a family of three girls and a boy, so my childhood home leaned to the feminine side.
At home now, it's me and my husband and our two sons. I am, as a friend who is the mother of four sons says "a rose among thorns." So the girls in my life are not my own, but rather, my godchildren. Here they are: Abbey, Alicia, Becca, Carmelinia, Dorsey-Camila, Francesca and Katherine!

Aren't they fabulous?!

 

There is a garden in her eyes, where roses and white lilies flow.

 Thomas Campion

A Little Bit Closer Now: Help Some Needy Children Make Music

Thanks to the power of social media, a kind-hearted editor named Elizabeth Scalia and the willingness of folks to donate money to strangers, Stretto Youth Chamber Orchestra now is just $2,500 short of its goal, down from $4,000 10 days ago when I first started pestering people about it.

In case you missed it: The money being raised is to ensure all orchestra members can go on tour. The orchestra is remarkable because Stretto gathers children from a wide range of backgrounds - from boarding schools to foster homes - to make beautiful classical music.

Later this month, most members of Stretto Youth Chamber Orchestra are flying to Europe for a tour.  Families have been hosting fundraisers all year to make sure every musician who wants to go, will. To make a tax-free donation to the tour via paypal, visit Blue Mountain Music Festival's website, bluemountainfestival.org.

You can read more about the orchestra here:

Readers: Can You Help Some Teen Musicians Make Joyful Noises?

I have written before about the wonderful chamber music orchestra that our older son is privileged to be part of. This eclectic group of musicians, called Stretto Youth Chamber Orchestra, is gathered together by the amazing Sherri Anderson, a joy-filled Christian whose life's mission is to bring music to everyone. Her musicians come from an extraordinary  range of settings - from boarding schools to homeless shelters and foster homes.

I don't think I've ever asked my readers to consider making a tax-deductible contribution to a worthy cause, but I am asking you now.

Father James Martin, S.J.:George Carlin With a Roman Collar and No Potty Mouth

I've "known" Father James Martin S.J. for years. My friend Webster Bull was deeply influenced by his book "My Life with the Saints" and so I read it too.  The book, which explained to me for the first time and in a very accessible way,  who and what saints are, is  a huge part of my continuing conversion. I follow Father Jim on twitter, I am a "friend" of his on Facebook and I read his articles as Editor at Large of  America magazine when they pop up on my facebook newsfeed. And I have seen his frequent appearances as the unofficial "chaplain" of the Colbert Report.

So in my 21st century way, I felt like I "knew" him. Of course, I didn't. I had no idea how laugh-out-loud funny the man is until I went to a talk he gave tonight on the Rutgers campus. My girlfriend Melissa, who went with me, compared him to George Carlin. Yes, a G-rated George Carlin with a Roman collar and without profanity.

On Marrying Young, and On Staying Married

First, I wanted to share a wonderful article in a magazine called Verily. This piece, called "Married in a Single Society: Here's to the Adventure!" was written by Eva Haine, a Princeton University graduate, the new sister-in-law of a friend of mine. (pictured here on her wedding day). Second, I wanted to share some of my own reflections on staying married, as my husband and I embark on our twentieth year of marriage.

The Whovians Are Taking Over Our House Tonight!

Here in the United States, BBC America is showing the Season 7 premiere of Dr. Who. Our 12 year old last week cycled through our town to send out invitations to classmates who are fellow Whovians. Tonight a small group of costumed boys are in our house, eating Dr. Who foods - including fish fingers with custard, bowtie pasta and a fabulous tardis cake.

Musings on September Despair and Hope

As September approaches I find myself in a reflective mood. September is full of meaning to me.

September isn't an easy month for me. In early September of 1996, we nearly lost our first-born son within days after his birth. Then in 2001, the day before that son's fifth birthday, my husband nearly lost his own life in the World Trade Center attacks. In both instances, I felt as if the ground beneath my feet had disappeared.

In the intervening years I also have come to see these experiences as a way for God to tell me to appreciate the precious, fragile lives of my loved ones, to never take their presence in my life for granted.

After a Novena: What Are Some Good Ways to Show Gratitude?

My girlfriend K., like me, was raised Catholic and like me, did not receive a full grounding in the faith.  She asked me yesterday how best to show her gratitude to God for answered prayers. "Prayer works!" she told me yesterday. "It really really works!" I'd like to ask you, dear readers, what your suggestions might be.

This Moment: With the Cousins

. . . . . . . .

{this moment} - A Friday ritual. A single photo - no words - capturing a moment from the week. A simple, special, extraordinary moment. A moment I want to pause, savor and remember.

If you're inspired to do the same, leave a link to your 'moment' at www.soulemama.com

At Home Away From Home, In An Unfamiliar Parish

My younger son and I are in Bedford, New York, visiting with my parents and with my sister and her children, who live next door. My family only recently moved to  Bedford and for me, something is so powerful about attending Mass in an unfamiliar place.