On New Year's Eve and That Holy Day Tomorrow

When I was a young adult, I was annoyed by the Solemnity of Mary, the Mother of God, a Holy Day of Obligation that falls on New Year's Day. It felt to me as if the Church were acting like a scolding mother, insisting we show up bright and early New Year's Day for Mass. It felt as if the underlying strategy was to make sure we didn't drink too much the night before. Is this holy day really necessary?

Ringing Out 2014: A Photo Montage

In a break with a long family tradition, I did not send out a Christmas letter or a Christmas card this year. I do not think I sent them out last year either. It has not been a priority. I blogged intermittently: too much real life happening here. 

When I spied this link up,  however, I figured I would do that.This was the year our older son graduated from high school and we launched him into college, and the year our younger son switched high schools. 

We all traveled a lot this year; my husband went as far west as Portland, Oregon  and our older son spent two weeks in Valencia, Spain. I spent time this year in Virginia, Vermont, Indiana, Florida, North Carolina, Massachusetts, Texas and New York. 

Midway through the year, I lost a treasured spiritual guide. 

I joined Weight Watchers, our parish choir (with our younger son) and finished a half marathon, (with my husband). When I was culling through photos to mark our year, I realized most of my fondest memories come  from right here in central New Jersey. 

Happy new year to my friends old and new. 

 "Ring out, wild bells, to the wild sky,

The flying cloud, the frosty light.

The year is dying in the night;

Ring out, wild bells, and let him die.

The year is dying in the night;

Ring out, wild bells, and let him die."

Thoughts As Our Son Leaves Home

I developed a new habit for a week or so this summer: I would scan google news for reports of missing people. I even would type "missing" into its search bar and read the stories: missing tourists, missing Amish girls, missing man, missing teen and on and on.

Independence Day Teens and Food

The vegan, gluten free Springtime Strawberry Lime Crisp is baking in the oven. My husband and I will be taking it, along with his should-be-world famous corn, to our dear family friends.

Our sons are in Spain and Florida, exercising their own independence. We miss them terribly but are so happy to know they are having beautiful experiences, the eldest at a home stay with the Experiment in International Living in Valencia, the younger at a goal-keeper camp in St. Petersburg. The organizers of that camp, who coached Tim Howard here in New Jersey, had scheduled him to help run the camp. World Cup Success intervened.
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One Last Enchanting Friday Night

Tonight marks the end to the lovely ends of my work weeks.

Every Friday night during the past five school years I have driven our son Gabriel to Princeton, New Jersey --  sharing more than an hour through rush hour traffic so he could attend his chamber-music orchestra rehearsals.  Recently, with his learners' permit, he's been driving me. For two of those years I have spent the two hours of Friday night rehearsals with one of my dearest friends, whose daughter is also in the orchestra. Jane, who is raising four daughters about an hour from us,  and I have gone on long walks or headed to the local Panera to "solve world problems" as we like to put it.

At Our House: St. Joseph's Day Feasting

As I drove to the 65,000-square-foot wholesale bakery at the top of a hill, I could smell the bread baking, even behind my van's closed windows. Inside the retail store of Anthony and Sons, there were more smells - and sights - of bread baking. Some of my students work here and I have never visited. Today, being St. Joseph's Day, I decided to. I never tire of discovering the treasure troves of my faith; tonight my parish will celebrate with a special Mass so we might contemplate the man who raised the son of God.

On the Feast of the Holy Family: Reality Check

This is the Feast of the Holy Family, a celebration I never liked growing up because I felt the annual homily by the pastor at my hometown parish idealized Jesus and his parents and left me feeling my profoundly imperfect family could never measure up.

Now that I am quite a bit older and a bit wiser, I understand that families come in every shape and size. All of them are imperfect, and all of them can be the place where, for the rest of our lives, we learn to grow in mercy, compassion and patience. Today, an almost-forgotten voice from my childhood that helped me understand that.

Already But Not Yet: Our Advent Dinner

On Saturday night, Father Jeff Calia, C.O., gave a wonderful homily about what it means to be a Christian. We are the "already and not yet" people; we commemorate the resurrection of Christ and yet, we are still waiting to meet Him face to face. And this, to me, is how we should live: understanding the  Kingdom of God is here and now and also has not yet happened.  We live in the world, but are not of the world. We inhabit that paradox.

Happy Thanksgiving

As my friend Scott Dodge reminds us, every day for a Christian should be a thanksgiving - a prayer of gratitude for the life we were called into, for the opportunity to seek Beauty in our circumstances. This particular day of Thanksgiving is almost over.

Theme Thursday: Double (Providence, Rhode Island)

OK, Cari's photo theme today is "Double." I'll be honest. I wanted to find a way to show off this picture of our sons. Two sons, Double. That works, right?

I took this photo at the Ruth's Chris Steak House in Providence, where we celebrated my (gulp) 51st birthday. The boys are notorious for not wanting their pictures taken, especially when I look like a goof using my iPad to get the shots. Oh well. I told them this was their birthday present to me.

Now that they both are high school teens, it is great to see their bond develop even more. They protect one another, defend each other, help each other and yes, annoy the heck out of each other. 

This Moment: Our Nearly Grown Boys, Lower East Side

For those of you who know our family, the existence of this picture is an enormous deal. For years, our sons have refused to have their pictures taken. They will wave their hands in front of the camera so their faces are blurry. A friend of Gabriel's took this photo last Sunday on the Lower East Side in front of a hip eating place called BaoHaus.  We all were there to celerate Gabriel's 17th birthday. You must go to BaoHaus if you find yourself in Manhattan. The place serves amazing Taiwanese street food. Gabriel has been taking his high school buddies for months, and this is the first time we joined him.

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In Manhattan: Sunny Day, Everything's A-OK

I decided not to bring my camera or my cell phone today into Manhattan, where our family spent a spectacular day celebrating our older son's 17th birthday. I wanted to fully engage my eyes and ears in what we were doing and experiencing and not have the filter of my electronics. I'm glad I did. 

Birthday Boy Says: "No Candles, No Singing, No Pictures"

I don't know much about raising girls. We never had a daughter. The past 17 years in this house have been all about boys: Legos, Tinker Toys, Lincoln Logs, Matchbox cars, comic books, Star Wars. These days our home is cluttered with soccer cleats, bike helmets, golf clubs, goal-keeper gloves, bass bows, trumpet music, and rosin.Tonight, our older son's 17th birthday, was, well, boyish.

On Staten Island: Feast Day for Our Lady of Good Health (Vailankanni), Fast Day for Syria

This is the day Pope Francis asked Christians worldwide to fast and to pray for our brothers and sisters in Syria. It also is the feast day of Our Lady of Good Health (Vailankanni). Today, I traveled with our younger son and three of my CL friends from New Jersey to a Staten Island parish where we joined hundreds of others in fasting for Syria and feasting for Our Lady of Good Health.

Tenured Today!

After three years and a day of teaching public school in New Jersey, I am tenured. To celebrate, my colleagues made a tenure tunnel for me and the two colleagues who had also  earned tenure. Tonight, Greg took me out for a seafood dinner at one of our favorite restaurants, The Barge in Perth Amboy. 

At Mohonk: Thinking About Fitness and the Inexhaustibility of Human Desire

This summer, I've been determined to get fit. Given my excess weight, I see my battle as a life-or-death struggle to stay healthy for my husband and our sons. In addition to swimming 30 minutes a day, I've been strength training with the help of a personal trainer and spending an hour a day on the treadmill, trying my best to increase the pace and incline of  the treadmill. This morning, on a hike in New Paltz, New York, I was reminded, once again, that whatever endeavor we humans undertake, nothing but the Infinite will satisfy us. 

This Moment: Mohonk Mountain House

To celebrate our 20th wedding anniversary, Greg and I are spending time at Mohonk Mountain House., a resort in the Hudson Valley of New York State that dates from the late 19th century. Here, Greg checks out the view from our room as we arrive.

And, in case you are wondering, here is our view...

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Confirmation and "A World Unbound by Time"

Usually, I imagine eternity as time never ending. I imagine it like an infinite number, like this one. This means when I think about heaven I think of a place where time goes on and on and on. Interminable. It sounds so dull.

This Pentecost, our younger son was confirmed in the Catholic Church. During the liturgy I had this powerful, visceral sense of eternity. I felt it all the way to my bones. It was not the kind of eternity I usually imagine, but the kind of eternity I have come to understand, a world unbound by time.

Celebrating a Perfect Gift!

Today I got to help my friend K., who teaches at the same high school I do, celebrate her daughter's first birthday! It has been a long time since I have been to a child's birthday party, given that our own sons are 13 and 16 years old. So I didn't mind driving an hour each way to help her large extended family and circle of friends celebrate Joy's first year on the planet.

Seven Quick Takes for Friday

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1.  Today's drive to work was treacherous. Snow was pelting down and the roads were slick. I was driving our 20-year-old Saturn, which has a poor defroster, no upholstery on the ceiling and no working horn up an interstate jammed with trucks and littered with accidents and police lights. (Our van is in the shop.) About halfway through the commute, I began praying the rosary out loud. Ten Hail Marys followed by the Our Father and Glory Be. Over and over again. I began to feel calm and the presence of peace. I made it to work. Thanks be.